Monthly Archives: June 2016

A Painting at a Bar in San Antonio 

Stories, Training Horses

While staying in a hotel on the Riverwalk in San Antonio, some years ago, I strolled into the bar and saw above the bar a very unique sculpture of a line of horses, shoulder to shoulder, looking at the viewer, maybe a dozen or more horses. I asked the bartender what it was and he looked at the title plate and said “the formando.” I then asked him what that was, and he said “that, right there.” Well, that didn’t get me very far, did it? But the mystery was soon solved when an article came out in Western Horseman magazine about the cowboys on the great Chaparrosa Ranch in South Texas. The author had visited the ranch, and described how The cowboys caught their horses each morning to work cows in that brushy country. What I read astonished me, and captivated my imagination, and I’ve spent a decade trying to duplicate the technique, with mediocre results.

The Caporal (straw boss) strides down into a pen of cow ponies, and instructs two cowboys to stretch up a lariat rope between them. He then gives a signal at which all the horses come and line up shoulder to shoulder with their butts against the rope. The cowboys simply walk to this line of horses, called “the formando” and halter their choice for the day and walk away, no muss, no fuss, no bother!So what’s the secret? Over time a trainer working with a single horse in an alleyway prods the horse in the butt with a sotol stalk until the horse turns to face him. At that point he strokes it’s neck gently with the stalk. After many patient repetitions the horse learns that when approached with a stick he’s to face the vaquero. Then the horse learns to back up to the gate. Later other horses who have been trained one at a time are added together. If it’s done right, every day, a group of horses will readily back up to a rope stretched between two men in the same way as they did in the alleyway, shoulder to shoulder.In time more trained horses are added together.Certainly this is a big improvement on chasing horses to catch them, and in the daily saving of time and trouble very much worth the time invested to produce this wonder of the south Texas brush!

It’s Flooding in Texas

Philosophy

“What nature doesn’t do to us, will be done by our fellow man,” is a line from a song of political satire done by the Kingston Trio back in the sixties. Strangely, living through these past few weeks in Texas has brought that line back to mind. Ironically, the song also bemoans… “and Texas needs rain!” Which is certainly NOT true this week! Notwithstanding, if nature doesn’t try to wipe us out, mankind is prepared to finish the job, at least if you can believe what is reported by the news media. This, of course was the situation referred to by the song forty years ago. Some things never change, only now, instead of the media reporting the news, we get opinions, and speculation… and three people talking at once! However it is certainly true that an overload of rain has caused the Brazos River to escape its banks, and the only people happy about it are the rice farmers. Not to be flippant, because indeed lives, livelihoods, and livestock have been lost, not to mention houses, and equipment, ruined or washed away! We pray for those folks downstream who have had their lives drastically changed by disaster and loss. We give thanks that our family has not been touched by tragedy. My compadres Bo and Glo in Bryan were only a stone’s throw from a tornado, but fortunately they sustained no major injury or damage.Meanwhile, life goes on. Ironically, next year, when the inevitable drought returns to our area, all this water will be but a memory. One has to wonder why we couldn’t get it nicely spread out. But then life would be so boring. Everything we did in agriculture would work out right. Everyone would be relaxed and happy, and we’d have happy families, and no one would be poor or undereducated or bigoted or slighted, oops! I guess I forgot, I was only supposed to report the news about the floodwater. By the way, did you know that you are made of 95% water? It’s like the old saying 

“You can’t live with it, you can’t live without it.” 

 Well, I gotta go, my canoe is ready to take me to the barn, see ya!

Make Lemonade and Buy More Cows!

Philosophy

In 2011 we were praying for rain. Now we’ve got Biblical flooding, and more coming. It’s like Monsoon season come to central Texas! The Brazos River, which is very near our ranch, is about to crest at 16 feet above bank level. Houston and surrounding flatlands are in a state of emergency high water rescue, now going into the second week. Sure am glad we live on top of a hill !  So, what’s the lesson to be learned in all this, between historic drought, and legendary flooding? Puts me in mind of an old 70’s song, “we’re just making the best of a bad situation.”  But that smacks of survivor thinking, and I’d rather celebrate. Like the marine motto “improvise, adapt, and overcome! “We are thinking “with this much grass – more cows!”  We’re planting trees, enlarging the garden, dancing in our rubber boots and yeller slickers, boiling crawfish and making music on the front porch! Like my wife’s mom always says “when life hands you a lemon, make lemonade! “

Don’t worry, in Texas the old saying goes like this “if you don’t like the weather now, wait fifteen  minutes!  But sometimes I’m reminded of another saying,

“cheer up, things could be worse! So I cheered up, and sure enough things got worse!”  

Was that a dove that just flew by me with an olive branch in its mouth?

The Venerable Military Food vs The Chuck Wagon Cook

Chuck Wagon Cooking

In one war it was K – rations, in another C – rats, then more recently MRE’s, abbreviation for “meal ready to eat,” or as Robin Williams said, “meal ready to excrete!” In any event, while we were all in our military service we were introduced to a novel form of food preparation. What we encountered was often relatively unappetizing fare designed to infuse scientifically correct percentages of carbohydrates, proteins, fats and fiber into soldiers in the field. Well, I have two brothers who managed to make “chicken salad out of chicken litter,” so to speak, by using imaginative combinations of MRE’s to make nearly gourmet meals! The rest of us suffered in silence, or complained, like Hawkeye in M.A.S.H.

A cup of Arbuckles coffee and a bowl of biscuits and gravy!
One old standard actually made it into civilian cuisine, the fabled S.O.S, or  “s – on a shingle.”  Ask any veteran to explain that. My mom called it chipped beef gravy on toast, and we had it fairly often. A variant of S.O.S. is sausage gravy on biscuits, and it’s an old chuckwagon favorite. It’s preparation is pretty simple, you make biscuits in one Dutch oven, while in a skillet, fry up some Jimmy Dean, or other sausage patties, but chop them into crumbs. Take out the browned sausage, throw flour into the grease (add a little oil if needed) stir it until it smells like burnt popcorn, like making a roux. In fact, that is exactly what you are doing. stir in some milk, salt and pepper, then put the sausage back in stir it up and pour it on the biscuits. That and strong hot black coffee – Larrupin!