Monthly Archives: March 2016

Learn’n Gaelic to a Pony

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Years ago I spent some time being tutored by a couple of seasoned driving trainers, as we were frequently driving buggies in local parades. This now horrifies me.  I have seen, over the intervening years, far too many of the things that can go wrong when, instead of being between your stirrups, a horse is 10 feet out in front of your wheeled vehicle, connected to you by long reins.

In view of the upcoming celebration of St. Patrick, it is also curious to me that my mentors (tor-mentors?) had names like McAllister, O’Carroll and McLennan.

Closeup of the eye and fur of the face of a donkey.

One year I was commissioned to train a pair of Belgian mares as a team to pull a wagon. All too late, I was informed that these gals had run off with and demolished a wagon. Gentle giants my left foot! As I spent a year working with them, rehabilitating their warped minds, I found these men’s methods were tremendous help. We finally molded those mares into a team, and we drove them on some trail rides! They actually became fun to drive and when they left here we were even a little wistful at their leaving. The things I don’t miss are: lugging around 50 pounds of harness and getting stepped on by dinner-plate sized hooves, carrying half a ton of mare!

Once, when a somewhat troublesome pony was trying Tom O’Carroll’s nerves, I remember him threatening the pony with

“well now, I guess I’ll be taychin’ ye Gaelic!”

Balance - Two weathered cart wheels leaning against an adobe wall.

Balance

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Balance. Now there’s a simple word if ever there was one. And yet when I’m trying to put my socks on in the morning I find it not so simple. I also find it not so simple when I’m horseback to achieve balance, or equilibrium, as my Latin friends call it, in my horse riding. But to polish it off, sometimes finding balance in my life is the ultimate challenge. Like, how does one balance a job, a hobby (read: passion), a family and a bank account; all at once? Every day comes with a new challenge. You thought you were going to work with (? play with) four horses, but the float valve on the middle water tank chose today to start leaking and the neighbors cows broke into your bale yard!

At times like these it seems somehow not foremost in my mind to search for harmony and equanimity. These days (and in some weeks there are eight of them) require action–and cussing!

So often the best I can do is to come up with what my wife calls “creative swearing,” as I jam my pick up into four-wheel-drive and slowly sink deeper into the pasture.

“Son of a pea-pick’n mangy female canine biscuit-eater,” or in Spanish “Hijo de tú madre!”

Then a month or so later, sitting on the front porch with a cold Corona, it’ll make a good story. Or if you’re willing to treat the truth a little recklessly–a great story!

Cabin Fever

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Making Cobbler CrustWinters in Texas are sometimes notorious, sometimes glorious. This winter barely merits the name. Our local ranchers were happy about how mild it is on one hand, but bemoaning the lack of rainfall on the other. One even said that given the temperature in the 70’s in February, we might be looking at some real blistering days in July and August.

We like to invite friends to come spend a few days away from the snow and deep-freeze when they can get loose. This February our guru chuckwagon cook Carl Hawkins and his wife Jo came to spend the weekend. Having them here with our bunch was nothing short of hilarious. We exchanged recipes, cooked, pulled out the chuckwagon and shared jokes and stories for three or four days. I forgot which, because there was a pretty dense fog a lot of the time.

Glenn and Carl

Carl is known for his quick one-liner responses, like when a woman coming down the chow line looked in a pot and

asked “what’s that?” He replied, “what do you want it to be?!”

He’s also generous and really good to his friends, and brought me a Carhart jacket that Wes Mastic had sewn wonderful leather tooling onto the caller and the bottom edge. It was delightful having them both here and we’re onto him now, because it looks like the real cook is Jo! Well, Except for the barbecue pit, nobody beats Carl’s Brisket!

How to make Texas Chili

Chuck Wagon Cooking

How do you make Texas chili?

The only thing more intimidating to me than touting a chili recipe in Texas would be to offer a recipe for barbecue, where every one-horse-town in the state has a pit barbecue joint, and a winner of the Terlingua Chili Cookoff! And I’ll warn you, we’re close to Mexico, so we like it spicy! (Picante)

Chuckwagon during setup
Chuckwagon during setup

President Lyndon Johnson said he couldn’t wait to get home to a bowl of red! The first known chili recipe was in response to a panhandle radio cooking contest in the 1920’s. It was by an old rancher who called it “Styew, without the ___  ___ beans!”

In a large cast-iron pot over medium high heat, brown in oil (your choice) about a half to a third of a pound of chopped or ground meat (your choice, venison, beef, goat, whatever). Take it out to drain, and sauté onion chopped. Put the meat back in, turn down to simmer and add water to cover. Then add chili powder (pure ground red chili pie pods), cumin, tomatoes (canned is ok) and simmer an hour or two. Then add garlic, oregano, thyme, salt and pepper, and simmer until they blend, maybe half hour. Finally thicken it. You can use cornmeal stirred in if you want it gluten-free or you can make a roux of flour and oil, and when it turns to goo that smells like burnt popcorn, add at it in in small amounts while stirring. No beans! But you can put anything else in it you want (some folks add a little sugar).